Closing Time

"Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end."

Just moved out of our apartment... Feeling a range of emotions: nostalgia and bitter-sweetness, sadness at one chapter closing, excitement and nervousness for what lays ahead... but most of all, feeling such a sense of deep gratitude and thankfulness -- for our time in NY, for the friends and family who surround us, and for this apartment we call home.  After all our travels and even our stay-cations in fun hotels around NYC, we've always been so grateful to come home to 3E.  

While I never would have planned it this way, the last week has been an incredible gift.  With Tyler leaving for Seoul last Monday, it also meant that all the major logistical items (packing, moving, cleaning, storing!!) needed to be done before he left... and so we found ourselves working until 2:30am early Monday morning, when he left for his flight (but not before an epic champagne tasting with our good friends -- more on that on another post...)

So this week has been all icing.  An opportunity to see good friends and family who weren't able to make it to our going-away party, or to spend more time with those who did anyway... and an opportunity to just walk around the city, having countless "I love New York" moments.  It's been a balancing act of staying present, yet taking mental pictures of everything, feeling already nostalgic for the moments even as I'm living them.

As I pack up my final items in the apartment and begin the inevitable dance to and from our storage unit ("just one more thing to put in there!"), I find myself lingering over the remaining items we're leaving for our new tenant.  I also begin to reflect on what "home" is.  It's a physical place, sure.  But it's also a frame of mind.

I'm heading to Asheville tonight for John Tucker's wedding, a dear friend and Hyderabad roommate.  While Indira 202 was where I lived for three years, it was mostly during that first year (the one that forever lives in technicolor for me) that it was truly "home" -- a place both restful and magical, where we flew kites on the roof at Sankranti and hosted parties welcoming the monsoon.

And "home", as my mom has always taught me, is about the people you love.  It's been an incredible gift to be neighbors with my parents this summer, with their moving to an apartment a block away.  I'm already considering it my adopted home, leaving toiletries there for my visits back.

And of course, home is where Tyler is.  I can't fathom that I was seriously considering staying in NY for a year while Tyler moved to Seoul.  Looking at the empty bookshelf where photos once stood, I was reminded of a memory from when we went sailing in Greece last summer.  We're standing on the deck, and I'm excited but petrified of jumping into the water from such a great height.  But as soon as Tyler jumps in, I immediately yell, "Wait for me!!" -- as I jump in myself, forgetting my fear.  It's like that way now.  His leaving NYC felt much too soon, but now that he's there in Seoul, I'm driven to jump right in with him.

And so with that, I triple-check that everything is in its place, turn off the lights, and pull the door locked behind me.  Thank you, 3E.  We'll see you again soon.