There's an old Cherokee legend that I love. It's a grandfather talking to his grandson, telling him about a terrible fight going on inside him against two wolves: one is evil (anger, envy, greed, arrogance, lies, superiority, and ego); the other is good (love, peace, hope, serenity, kindness, compassion, and faith). The grandson thinks about it for a minute and then asks: "which wolf will win?" The grandfather states simply: "The one you feed."
On a macro level, this is exactly what I feel is happening in America right now.
I woke up feeling resigned but finally starting to accept the new reality. Then I checked email and saw this link that Andrew sent about Day 1 in Trump's America:
https://twitter.com/i/moments/796417517157830656
It's scary, vicious, and so so full of hate... and I have to believe that by definition, these are the most extreme examples, notable because they are so beyond the norm... And perhaps by exposing to the light what was hidden in shadows, we can now actually do something about it (the Avenue Q song: "Everybody's a Little Racist Sometimes" draws laughs in that there is truth... we are all a bit racist, and sexist, and fearful of the "other"). AND the hatred espoused in that twitter link is so much scarier and uglier and full of vitriol than I have ever thought or expected in our country.
So that's one wolf, and sadly it seems it's not hard to find examples of all the hatred and ugliness.
And the other wolf is love. I got an email this morning called "Practicing the Dharma in Uncertain Times." It's from a teacher I admire, who tells us to "take time to quiet the mind and tend to the heart...then go out to look at the sky" -- to remember the vastness, to remember there are seasons to all things, and to learn equanimity and steadiness from the trees.
Yes, perhaps I'll get there one day. But today is not the day. To me, that feels like some political form of spiritual bypassing -- where you push your anger and sadness and disappointment and hurt and questioning down down down... and smile at the trees and look for silver linings.
Yesterday I was all about taking action and being the change... today I'm feeling much more internal and introspective... In our first week as Acumen Fellows, we talked about the idea of a "philosopher king" -- someone who is reflective and introspective, while also is about action and change. I'm realizing that in this too, there is a dance. taking it all in, being in action, being in service. And yes, being angry.
But here's the thing. in a country as diverse as America, we will always be divisive about what to do with our anger. There's Michael Moore's "to do" list solution that includes preparing to impeach Trump. There's all the people who are protesting the election results (I was actually shocked to hear this, perhaps I live in an even bigger expat-bubble than I realized). There's Aaron Sorkin's letter to his daughter that is now going viral online.
As much as I feel anger and disappointment and loss, I also want to be mindful of which wolf I feed inside me. Because in the toxic political environment we find ourselves in now, we all seem so quick to point our finger at the "other" -- versus first looking within ourselves. We seem so quick to espouse our views with certainty, rather than truly addressing this with genuine curiosity and introspection. I mean, I get it -- I look at the twitter link and the last thing I want to do is be genuinely curious.
But I also must believe that these are just the fringes. The majority of those who voted for Trump are not members of the KKK (as much as I like Aaron Sorkin, elements of his letter only feed the immense gulf of understanding in our country), do not condone sexual assault (I must believe that), and do not feel that immigrants should be deported en masse (please let this be true). They voted for change. Which is exactly what I and so many of my peers and community voted for in 2008 with Obama.
There's a great TED talk that came to mind in the days following the election: link here. In it, Simon Sinek presents a simple framework around leaders, beginning with a core "why". Stemming from this core circle are larger circles: the "how", and finally, the "what". Everything I'm reading, it seems we are so focused on the "what" -- and barely listening to each other at that. While I'm far from having any answers, it seems that part of the healing journey needs to be from spewing the outer "what", to truly listening to one another's inner "why".
And with that, I'll end this rambly top-of-mind post with a website that my friend and former colleague, James Dunbar, is building called: https://www.moreperfect-listen.org/
It's an opportunity to just listen to others with vastly different backgrounds and life situation than yours. The first and nearly only rule is: Don't be an asshole.
I just signed up for beta testing; click on the link above if you're moved to do the same.
Oh, and those wolves? I have to believe my teacher, Rochelle Schieck: "Inevitably, we know how this ends. Inevitably, we always come back to love."
America, I know we'll get there.
On a macro level, this is exactly what I feel is happening in America right now.
I woke up feeling resigned but finally starting to accept the new reality. Then I checked email and saw this link that Andrew sent about Day 1 in Trump's America:
https://twitter.com/i/moments/796417517157830656
It's scary, vicious, and so so full of hate... and I have to believe that by definition, these are the most extreme examples, notable because they are so beyond the norm... And perhaps by exposing to the light what was hidden in shadows, we can now actually do something about it (the Avenue Q song: "Everybody's a Little Racist Sometimes" draws laughs in that there is truth... we are all a bit racist, and sexist, and fearful of the "other"). AND the hatred espoused in that twitter link is so much scarier and uglier and full of vitriol than I have ever thought or expected in our country.
So that's one wolf, and sadly it seems it's not hard to find examples of all the hatred and ugliness.
And the other wolf is love. I got an email this morning called "Practicing the Dharma in Uncertain Times." It's from a teacher I admire, who tells us to "take time to quiet the mind and tend to the heart...then go out to look at the sky" -- to remember the vastness, to remember there are seasons to all things, and to learn equanimity and steadiness from the trees.
Yes, perhaps I'll get there one day. But today is not the day. To me, that feels like some political form of spiritual bypassing -- where you push your anger and sadness and disappointment and hurt and questioning down down down... and smile at the trees and look for silver linings.
Yesterday I was all about taking action and being the change... today I'm feeling much more internal and introspective... In our first week as Acumen Fellows, we talked about the idea of a "philosopher king" -- someone who is reflective and introspective, while also is about action and change. I'm realizing that in this too, there is a dance. taking it all in, being in action, being in service. And yes, being angry.
But here's the thing. in a country as diverse as America, we will always be divisive about what to do with our anger. There's Michael Moore's "to do" list solution that includes preparing to impeach Trump. There's all the people who are protesting the election results (I was actually shocked to hear this, perhaps I live in an even bigger expat-bubble than I realized). There's Aaron Sorkin's letter to his daughter that is now going viral online.
As much as I feel anger and disappointment and loss, I also want to be mindful of which wolf I feed inside me. Because in the toxic political environment we find ourselves in now, we all seem so quick to point our finger at the "other" -- versus first looking within ourselves. We seem so quick to espouse our views with certainty, rather than truly addressing this with genuine curiosity and introspection. I mean, I get it -- I look at the twitter link and the last thing I want to do is be genuinely curious.
But I also must believe that these are just the fringes. The majority of those who voted for Trump are not members of the KKK (as much as I like Aaron Sorkin, elements of his letter only feed the immense gulf of understanding in our country), do not condone sexual assault (I must believe that), and do not feel that immigrants should be deported en masse (please let this be true). They voted for change. Which is exactly what I and so many of my peers and community voted for in 2008 with Obama.
There's a great TED talk that came to mind in the days following the election: link here. In it, Simon Sinek presents a simple framework around leaders, beginning with a core "why". Stemming from this core circle are larger circles: the "how", and finally, the "what". Everything I'm reading, it seems we are so focused on the "what" -- and barely listening to each other at that. While I'm far from having any answers, it seems that part of the healing journey needs to be from spewing the outer "what", to truly listening to one another's inner "why".
And with that, I'll end this rambly top-of-mind post with a website that my friend and former colleague, James Dunbar, is building called: https://www.moreperfect-listen.org/
It's an opportunity to just listen to others with vastly different backgrounds and life situation than yours. The first and nearly only rule is: Don't be an asshole.
I just signed up for beta testing; click on the link above if you're moved to do the same.
Oh, and those wolves? I have to believe my teacher, Rochelle Schieck: "Inevitably, we know how this ends. Inevitably, we always come back to love."
America, I know we'll get there.
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