Earlier this week, Elliot met his great-grandmother Elaine for the first time. This was poignant for many reasons, a key one being that he was named after her (and my grandfather, Enrique) and was due on her birthday (still now, I get confused on whether his birthday is January 17th or 19th).
Difficult to put into words how special it is seeing a 92 year old and a 6 month year old -- both of whom you love so dearly -- playing with and enjoying each other so so much.
As I was watching and admiring the way they interacted, it hit me that a key reason this was so special is that I was witnessing two people who truly live in the present. You see, Grandma Elaine -- while being fiercely independent and incredibly kind ever since I first met her eight years ago -- now has Alzheimer's. At first, I found myself wishing "oh, if only she could have met him a couple years ago before Alzheimer's hit her." Yet then I realized that for all the challenges and difficulties of this disease, it also keeps her (and all of us who spend time with her) in the present. The past is difficult to remember; the future is tough to predict... so instead, we just spent a few hours living fully in the present, in the loving midst of her and Elliot.
"Live in the present" has become so trite a saying -- we have all heard it, yet it is difficult actually do this in practice. It means dropping easy stand-bys like: "how have you been? how was your week?" or even bringing up people who aren't in the room (oh, I saw this person last night) -- and instead being fully present with whomever is in the room at this point in time. It means fully feeling your feelings (like love and pride and even the tough bittersweet ones) without having the easy out of small talk.
Earlier this week, I got a lesson in that from the two best teachers I could think of. It all boils down to: enjoying who you're with, feeling gratitude for this precious time together, and knowing that this moment is more than enough.
From Grandma Elaine to Elliot: "I am so proud of you already, young man. You're gonna be something, I tell you. You will do great things". You can see the pride in her eyes:
Difficult to put into words how special it is seeing a 92 year old and a 6 month year old -- both of whom you love so dearly -- playing with and enjoying each other so so much.
As I was watching and admiring the way they interacted, it hit me that a key reason this was so special is that I was witnessing two people who truly live in the present. You see, Grandma Elaine -- while being fiercely independent and incredibly kind ever since I first met her eight years ago -- now has Alzheimer's. At first, I found myself wishing "oh, if only she could have met him a couple years ago before Alzheimer's hit her." Yet then I realized that for all the challenges and difficulties of this disease, it also keeps her (and all of us who spend time with her) in the present. The past is difficult to remember; the future is tough to predict... so instead, we just spent a few hours living fully in the present, in the loving midst of her and Elliot.
"Live in the present" has become so trite a saying -- we have all heard it, yet it is difficult actually do this in practice. It means dropping easy stand-bys like: "how have you been? how was your week?" or even bringing up people who aren't in the room (oh, I saw this person last night) -- and instead being fully present with whomever is in the room at this point in time. It means fully feeling your feelings (like love and pride and even the tough bittersweet ones) without having the easy out of small talk.
Earlier this week, I got a lesson in that from the two best teachers I could think of. It all boils down to: enjoying who you're with, feeling gratitude for this precious time together, and knowing that this moment is more than enough.
From Grandma Elaine to Elliot: "I am so proud of you already, young man. You're gonna be something, I tell you. You will do great things". You can see the pride in her eyes:
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