5 months!

The only thing preventing me from saying "time has flown" is the resolution I made earlier this spring that I wouldn't say that (though seriously, five months already?!)... Indeed, every day I'm truly feeling like "these are the magic moments".

Like many things, it took flying and getting away to re-remember what's most important (a big reason I love traveling as much I do).  This past weekend, we celebrated our five year anniversary in Hanoi (pics to come soon).  I realize only now that my mental model for the trip was centered around "watching" Elliot, mitigating risks of meltdowns, and leveraging naps as much as possible.  Food tours and dinners were scheduled around when Elliot was least likely to be in "witching hour" and we talked about walks and exploring as likely good times where he would nap in his stroller.

In all of this worrying and trying to mitigate risks, I hadn't considered what actually ended up happening: Elliot was such a joy and a blast to travel with!  He was super fun when we went out and explored... as well as helped us slow down (a lesson we both could use) and really relax at our incredible hotel as well.

A lot of my "before" mind frame stems from our weekends -- where we realized (only recently) that we could get the most done if we took 30 minute shifts of one of us being productive and the other person watching him.  Before that realization, it became more a game of: "let's get Elliot to sleep" so that we could do whatever it is we needed to get done.  You know, "life."

So I suppose the irony is it takes stepping out of day-to-day life to realize what matters most.  And it's pretty cliche to say that it isn't getting that last email out or checking how many facebook likes my last pic generated.  My goal has always been to be more present with Elliot.  But I realize that I was always thinking that was for Elliot's sake -- for him to have my full attention and presence so that he knows at his core he is worthy and loved and accepted.

Instead, what I realized in Hanoi this past weekend is this: Being fully present with Elliot is fun and so so enjoyable for us.  And when we stop trying to "do" things and check items off our Wunderlist, being fully present with Elliot is a complete joy and actually really easy to do -- not something to "check off" in itself.  He has a full personality of his own, and by slowing down and being present, we saw so much more of that this past weekend. 

In fact, I think we all fell in love with each other a little more over the few days.  My favorite memory is of the three of us lying on top of our hotel bed's fluffy white comforter after an incredible dinner outside... Tyler and Elliot had gone up early, and I joined them, with Elliot lying in between us.  When I laid down, he turned to me with the biggest smile.  We looked into each others eyes for a couple seconds, smiling; then he turned to Tyler with the biggest smile.  Then back at me.  Then back to Tyler.  Me.  Tyler.  Me.  Tyler.  Each time with boundless joy and happiness, that of course made us smile even more.

All of this made me realize how indeed quickly things happen and how easy it is to take it all for granted (and why I get obsessed with writing down as much as I can).  Elliot turns six months next week -- so before that, here are a few notes and pics of the last few weeks.

*     *     *

Hooray to five months!  If the first three months were all about survival, nourishment, and flourishing (the "fourth" trimester), the next few certainly seem to be all about learning.  This month, Elliot has learned to:

1. Sit (albeit precariously at first... this is four days after he turned five months):

2. Roll over from his back onto his stomach... Resulting in quite a few nights of waking us up multiple times each might with grunts from him that we turn him over (Tyler said this reminds him of turtles flipping onto their backs and needing to be turned right-side up).

3. ...and from his stomach to his back.  This started last week and was truly exciting because it's meant more sleep for us (see above).

 
4. Hold the bottle on his own (and boy has he been eyeing our food!)

5. Smile at strangers... he's become a big hit with the Korean ajummas along the lake.

6. Laugh!!! -- though we joke he's rationing these (or just clearly not finding us so funny, which is a very real possibility).  He's laughed a total of three times (but who's counting?).  The most hysterical thing to him these days seems to be open and closing our hands, and most recently, clapping.

He also seems to finally like when we kiss him (when he was first born for about three months, he hated being kissed on his face)... month 4 he finally started to tolerate it; now we've finally broken him down into actually liking it (probably realizing it wasn't ever going to stop).  All in all, five has been a pretty fun month indeed.